Who the hell are you? And what have you done with our daughter?!

Ask the parent of any child with type 1 diabetes and they’ll tell you that it’s like living with a miniature version of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Blood sugars absolutely rule our kids and we work feverishly to ensure that they’re always in range. To say “that is easier said than done” is an understatement, to put it mildly.

Alex is no exception. Early in the diagnosis, we could always tell whether or not she was low or high. When she was low, she would get all teary-eyed and upset. When she was high, she was angry and combative. Now, it seems that we’re having trouble differentiating between lows and highs, because she gets crazy for both. And when I saw crazy, I don’t mean like nutty and silly. I mean crazed, as in stark raving mad lunacy. If she were a cartoon character, her face would turn crimson and she’d have steam blowing out of her ears.

I’ve got to say, I am glad she’s only 8 years old, because if she were stronger, we’d all be in big trouble. She will physically attack Sean for even the slightest insult or transgression (he’s a notorious teaser). I have to get physical just to get her to calm down. And I don’t mean I physically beat her (though, God knows, I’m tempted), but I have to restrain her (I know she is going to hurt Sean one of these days; fortunately, he doesn’t retaliate, but I know its coming) or push or drag her into the bedroom and force her to calm down, all the while I’m giving her an injection of her potion, er, I mean her insulin. She will throw a tantrum the likes of which you never want to see.

The worst part of it all is that when Alex acts like that, it’s all my fault because I could have prevented it from happening in the first place. It’s my job to keep her numbers under control, and if Miss Hyde is unleashed, it’s because I neglected to give her insulin in the right dose or at the right time, or I didn't calculate her carb factor correctly or she ate more or less than I expected her to eat. I’m only human.

But so is Alexandra. And I have to remember that, and sometimes remind her brothers and her dad, that she can’t control herself. It takes a lot of will power and effort to calm yourself down when too much sugar is racing through your veins – you can’t think straight, you can’t even see straight. It takes insulin and time, in that order. And a lot of love. Oh yeah, a lot of that. But I’ve got to be honest; it isn’t easy loving her when she’s Miss Hyde, but I do it because I know that her alter-ego – Alexandra – is in there somewhere, ready to emerge from the darkness to be our normal little girl again.